Lumber Robber

A man enters a confessional and admits that for years, he’s been stealing building supplies from the lumberyard where he works.

“What did you take?” his priest asks.

“Enough to build my own house and enough for my son’s house. And houses for our two daughters and our cottage at the lake.”

“This is very serious,” the priest says. “I shall have to think of a far-reaching penance. Can you make a Novena?”

“I don’t know, Father,” the man replies. “But if you’ve got the plans, I can get the lumber.”